Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
