So drunk its hurt
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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