I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
