Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
