Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Success! We fucked roommates!
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