If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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