i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
