Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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