It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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