Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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