A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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