Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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