Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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