I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
