420 ftw
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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