hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
