I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
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