I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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