I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
