ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I looked at my own cervix.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
