don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
