You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
