that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
