Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
