Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
