Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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