i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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