Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize