I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
