i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
