you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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