This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
