i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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