So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
