i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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