She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
