apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
