he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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