At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
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