Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
