if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
