ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Just pee around me
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize