i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
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