I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
