Im at strip club and am horny
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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