Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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