I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
