Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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