This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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