I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
