I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize